Start by using positive self-talk, forgive yourself and maintain your health then do something nice for yourself.
In our subconscious mind we run conflicting programming that shows up in our lives as imbalance and flaws. We need to address the fallacy and biases in our lives as soon as possible.
One small action at a time, we break the old agreements and start to form new ones.
Here are some powerful ways to start that shift – note that these aren’t steps in order, but different ways you can work with the feeling of something being wrong with you:
Practice kindness & friendliness with yourself.
This is such a key and transformational practice: you practice looking at yourself with gentleness and friendliness. Just like you might look at a loved one with the same gentleness and friendliness, or light up with warmth when you see one of your best friends. That same feeling, turned on yourself. All the time. Whenever you look at yourself or something you’ve done, turn on the warm light of kindness to yourself, of friendliness and gentleness. Let go of the old ways of harshness, and transform it into kindness and warmth. What would it be like to do this all the time?
Use the pain as a path of transformation.
When we feel that there’s something wrong with us, it can feel painful. But this pain can be useful – drop into your body and feel the pain, as a physical sensation. Where is it located? Get curious about how it feels. The pain, then, is opening you to the present moment, instead of being caught up in your cycles of thinking negative things about yourself. It’s opening you to feeling the tenderness of your heart as well. It can also open you to compassion – if you’re feeling this pain, can you imagine how many others feel it? Can you feel compassion for every other being who feels this kind of pain? Can you send them kindness and love, from your tender heart?
See your basic goodness.
At our core, we are good. This is my belief. We have good hearts, we want to be happy, we want to be kind to others, and we have a wide-open awareness, compassion and connected-ness that is always available to us, if we can open up to it from our usual place of being caught up in self-concern. We can all practice seeing this goodness, and feeling it in our heart. Feel the compassion in your heart, that is always available. Feel the kind intentions, the love that emanates from your tender heart. This is your basic goodness, and you can practice seeing and feeling it in any moment. The more you practice with this, the more fundamental your trust in it will become.
Practice self-compassion regularly.
You can do this practice right now: feeling the pain of something being wrong with you, of being inadequate and unlovable. Can you wish for relief from this pain? Feeling the stress and disappointment in your body, can you wish for a feeling of peace? Can you wish for yourself to be happy? This wish can be felt in the heart, when you practice. Notice this feeling, and cultivate it regularly by wishing for a relief to your pain and stress, wishing for your own happiness and peace. It will help to heal the pain of something being wrong with you.
Use the self-doubt to open to curiosity.
You might feel doubt about whether you’re doing something right, about whether you can do something, about how you’re living and who you are. That’s OK! Doubt and uncertainty about yourself are not bad things. In fact, if we let them, they can open us to curiosity: I don’t know if I’m doing something right, can I get curious about how I should do this? Can I get curious about what this doubt feels like? Can I get curious about the task or topic without needing to know exactly how to do it? You can open to curiosity in any moment – it’s a space of not-knowing, a recognition that knowing is fixed but not-knowing is wide open and space for possibility, creation, exploration, play, wonder.
As you can see, the place of feeling that something is wrong with you is just a starting place. You can use it to transform, to find gentleness and friendliness, to find compassion, to open to the moment, to see your basic goodness.
Hypnotherapy has the ability to re-define, re-frame and restructure deep rooted emotions within the subconscious mind.